West Main

PONDER  BEFORE  YOU  POST

Last year we held a very good seminar on social media. As a result, I made several changes to how I interact in these mediums. I am still learning and improving every day. I just read a great article on it that I want to share key excerpts from:                                  – Pannell

Five Questions to Ask Before Posting to Social Media

by Cara Joyner (Relevant Magazine)

I was a freshman in college when Facebook came out and I distinctly remember thinking, “why would I need this? I have AOL Instant Messenger and MySpace! ”

Well, times have changed. Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Instagram (and a slew of other sites I’m not cool enough to know about) have simultaneously brought us closer together and driven us further apart. With the exception of a few universally offensive statements or pictures, it’s a rule-free zone where we can interact with society while accepting minimal personal responsibility for the implications of what we do.

In absence of guidelines for healthy and polite social media etiquette, we are left to determine our own boundaries for navigating the seemingly endless opportunities available to us.

Before we snap one more picture of our hot chocolate topped with a foam leaf, perhaps we would benefit from a brief pause—an extra thirty seconds to ask five simple questions might suggest it’s time to unplug, or at least reconsider when and how we use social media:

1. Am I seeking approval?  – If you’ve taken an introductory psychology class, you’ve probably heard of  B.F. Skinner and operant conditioning. Skinner suggested that we learn behaviors through reinforcement.

When I seek validation through something I post and that little red flag starts popping up to notify me of each person giving me attention, it’s an addictive reward. And it works. I feel better, so I keep coming back for more. The next time I need to feel approval, I’ll return to the source that poured it out last time, and the cycle of reinforcement continues.

What are the bigger needs asking to be met here? Maybe it’s a desire for community. Perhaps it stems from unresolved conflict with someone I love. Or maybe I just thrive on pleasing people and hearing their praise. If your interaction with the internet is driven by a need for approval, consider healthier ways to address this issue and choose to stop reinforcing the unhealthy ones.



2. Am I boasting?  –  There’s sharing excitement and then there’s bragging. Truthfully, we each know which camp we fall in.

When the Apostle Paul described what it meant to love others, he specifically mentioned that love does not boast. That post isn’t “just a picture” or “just a tweet,” it’s an opportunity to love others in a way that reflects Jesus. Or it’s an opportunity to show them something quite different, something that looks nothing like Christ.

Examine your motivations and walk away before using social media as the adult version of show-and-tell.

3. Am I discontent?  –  Are you looking for something “better”? If so, walk away. Nothing you will read, write or see is going to solve this one.

Instead, ask yourself why you are discontent and address those needs. When we view social media from a lens of discontentment, whatever we find will be colored with bitterness and ungratefulness. Their lives will begin to look brighter than ours, while our lives will take on a sense of lacking.

Let us not forget—their world is as ordinary as ours and our life is as exciting as theirs. Do you believe that in your core? If not, take a break. Deactivate your account for a couple months. Create space to reevaluate and look for answers in the places you’ll actually find them. Stop asking the virtual world to solve dissatisfaction with the physical one.

4. Is this a moment to protect?  –  When my son crawls into my lap, he doesn’t want me to take his picture and shoot it across Facebook. He doesn’t care who else thinks I have a cute kid. He just wants me to hold him and see him. To feel his soft, chunky arms and to focus on the way his eyelashes move when he blinks.

When we interrupt lunch with a friend in order to quote her on Twitter, we invite hundreds of people into a conversation that could have been sacred; and we miss the sweet memories that may have formed had her words remained simply between the two of us.

Not every great moment needs to be shared. In fact, some of the best times are most enjoyed privately. If we suspend the present in an attempt to capture its beauty in 140 characters or less, we sacrifice our experience of the moment itself. We also rob each other of something that has been lost in our digital age—keeping a handful of memories between us and those we are closest to, or even just between us and God.

5. Is it kind? –  Let’s return to Paul and his call to love. “Love is patient. Love is kind.”

Our culture tells us it’s our right to comment on everything, regardless of whether it was addressed to us and without consideration for how it might affect others.

We’ve replaced face-to-face confrontation with sharp comments and mocking memes. We write demeaning tweets addressed to celebrities or openly criticize individuals we have never met, hiding behind the convenience that they cannot directly defend themselves and nobody is putting our personal lives on display for public criticism.

We have been given covered space from which to throw grenades, without requiring us to take responsibility for the weight of our words, their effect on other people and their reflection on the Church. Jesus said the world would recognize us by our love. What messages are we sending?

A Better Way  –  Social Media seems to be built around the idea that it can infiltrate nearly every part of our lives. And if we let it, that’s exactly what will happen. We are the ones who say when its reach becomes unhealthy.

As children, our parents laid out rules for our protection and as adults we took on the task of caring for our own well being and personal growth. It’s our job to set boundaries and ask tough questions, tending to the bigger picture of our relationships and the way our actions reflect Christ’s love for this world.

It’s worth noting that these are questions we ask of ourselves, not criteria for interpreting and evaluating others. We cannot know their hearts anymore than they can know ours.

Let us pause and give ourselves an honest moment to reflect—bringing discernment, love and wisdom to each picture and word we share.

2014 Church Directory  --  The proof copy of the directory is posted in the hallway by the East Room. Please review your listing and initial if everything is correct or make the necessary corrections or additions. If your name is not listed and you would like to be included in our directory, please add your information on the sheet posted for new names. Also, if you would like to be added to or removed from the Prayer Chain, please check that listing also.

*Directory Photos – Sandra Cummings will be taking photos again this year. If your photo was not in our 2013 directory or if you would like to update your photo please call Sandra to schedule an appointment. We will be updating the entire photo directory, so contact Sandra ASAP and please keep your appointment time. Photos will be taken after Sunday morning services.

Children’s Worship Snacks  --  We are in need of snacks! Please remember to read labels – NO products with peanut in them or products processed on shared equipment. Thanks!

Lost and Found – Our lost and found is overflowing! Are you missing anything??? Please check the counter in the Fireside Room this Sunday to check for items you may be missing. All items not claimed THIS SUNDAY will be donated to a good cause.

Prime Timers – We are planning a Valentine Potluck Luncheon on Wednesday, February 19, in the Fireside Room. Be watching for more details. Contact person is Joan Tisdel.

Baptism  -- We are pleased to announce the baptism of Jack Spodnik on Saturday, January 18^th. Jack is the son of Mike and Codi Spodnik. Please welcome this new brother in Christ this Sunday.